Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite.
Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book, and does.
The whole of science is nothing more than a refinement of everyday thinking.
When you're in love it's the most glorious two and a half days of your life.
Do not worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older it will avoid you.
Moderation is a virtue only in those who are thought to have an alternative.
The two basic items necessary to sustain life are sunshine and coconut milk.
Advertising is what you do when you can't go see somebody. That's all it is.
I don't need you to remind me of my age. I have a bladder to do that for me.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men -- the other 999 follow women.
It is only when they go wrong that machines remind you how powerful they are.
There's a great power in words, if you don't hitch too many of them together.
Do I have an option? when asked by the press if she was "running as a woman."
I didn't know how babies were made until I was pregnant with my fourth child.
The world is divided into people who do things and people who get the credit.
Be able to go shopping for a bathing suit and not become depressed afterward.
The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutan trying to play the violin.
Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with Guess on it. I said, Thyroid problem?
I can be your best friend or your worst enemy. You seem to prefer the latter.
In expanding the field of knowledge we but increase the horizon of ignorance.
I'm kidding about having only a few dollars. I might have a few dollars more.
Thank you for sending me a copy of your book - I'll waste no time reading it.
Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't.
No woman should ever be quite accurate about her age. It looks so calculating.
I'd never been in play long enough for the flowers to die in the dressing room
If I read as many books as most men do, I would be as dull-witted as they are.
Women will forgive anything. Otherwise, the race would have died out long ago.
I love gentiles. In fact, on of my favorite activities is Protestant spotting.
I hope that the kind reader recognises this as a despairing attempt at humour.
When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife.
Nothing is wrong with California that a rise in the ocean level wouldn't cure.
The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop.
A politician thinks of the next election. A statesman, of the next generation.
Dude, are my eyes seeing what my brain is telling my eyes that they're seeing?
You can only find truth with logic if you have already found truth without it.
A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar.
The more learned and witty you bee, the more fit to act for Satan will you bee.
It's so obvious The Weather Channel is pro hurricane. Fair and balanced my ass.
Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other.
I don't think anyone should write their autobiography until after they're dead.
Never raise your hand to your children - it leaves your midsection unprotected.
I see you're a man with ideals. I better be going before you've still got them.
My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
Don't argue about the difficulties. The difficulties will argue for themselves.
I never knew what an engineer did for a living when I was a kid. I still don't.
There's nothing wrong with being shallow as long as you're insightful about it.
A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.
The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.