Being pregnant is a very boring six months. I am not particularly maternal. It's an occupational hazard of being a wife.

If a man is going to leave one wife to marry another, it's better if he divorces the first before he marries the second.

I'd like to thank the BBC for allowing me to work here. And I'd like to thank the wife and kids for making it necessary.

Most people don't want to leave their wife and children behind but many people seem to want to take leave of themselves.

When the king gets depressed, he doesn't call for his wife. He doesn't call for the cook. He calls for the court jester.

I love people and entertaining. The fact I can still do it, and it's with my wife is phenomenal. I wanna reach 95 years!

My wife is as handsome as when she was a girl, and I...fell in love with her; and what is more, I have never fallen out.

I was serious about retiring the first time, but the first week I was home my wife had SO many chores to do I went back.

My wife has a line of fine Indian foods, that's kind of a very successful business. It's an interesting way to see life.

Duran always disturbs me. The guy is just weird. Before our first fight, both Duran and his wife gave my wife the finger.

If I told my wife I was going to become a manager she'd say 'sign this then. Don't worry it's only a divorce. Au revoir'.

I met my wife by breaking two of my rules: never date a girl seriously that you meet at a nightclub and never date a fan.

I like to do things for my wife on Valentine's Day. I open the door for her when she puts laundry in the washing machine.

The job of the president of the United States is not to love his wife; it's to manage a wide range of complicated issues.

American comedies especially are all about these men being browbeaten by their wives and it's impossible for me to watch.

I'm Jewish and my wife isn't so right now we're literally decorating a Christmas tree with Jewish stars draped around it.

My wife has been my greatest earthly inspiration. She excels in eloquence, the poetry of words, empathy and graciousness.

Sir, I have quarrelled with my wife; and a man who has quarrelled with his wife is absolved from all duty to his country.

We acknowledge that we should not talk of our wives; but we seem not to know that we should talk still less of ourselves.

Being a wife and a mother is very gratifying, but it's not a creative expression and that's something I need to be happy.

It helps to be able to be alone. 'Cuz writing is done alone, unless you collaborate, but I don't do that. Ask my ex-wife.

All these people that I used to know, they're an illusion to me now. Some are mathematicians, some are carpenters' wives.

Women desire six things: They want their husbands to be brave, wise, rich, generous, obedient to wife, and lively in bed.

I feel like a divorced wife once my book is published and has left me, and hate to be brought back into intimate contact!

President Obama and his wife are going to Kenya. Donald Trump said, 'While you're there, pick up your birth certificate.'

Never let your wife prevent you from buying equipment. A car will not buy a synthesizer, but a synthesizer can buy a car.

Journalist: 'Have you received any death threats?' Harry Redknapp: 'Only from the wife when I didn't do the washing up!'.

The unhappiness of a wife with a good husband is much more devastating than the unhappiness of a wife with a bad husband.

In my house, neither my wife nor my daughter are impressed that I'm on television, and they remind me of that frequently.

Most vices may be committed very genteelly: a man may debauch his friend's wife genteelly: he may cheat at cards genteelly

My wife's father said if you marry my daughter I'll give you three acres and a cow. I'm still waiting for the three acres.

Surely a gentle sister is the second best gift to a man; and it is first in point of occurrence; for the wife comes after.

Girlfriend is such a stupid word. I couldn't stand calling her that. So, we had to get married, so I could call her 'wife.

The first thing I did when I sold my book was buy a new wedding ring for my wife and asked her to marry me all over again.

When I met my wife 20 plus years ago, she was a vegetarian, so I was the closest thing to the devil that she had ever met.

What's for dinner is the only question many husbands ask their wives, and the only one to which they care about the answer.

I dislike Ted Cruz as much as the next everyone. But that's no reason to be rude to Ted's loving wife and possible hostage.

I have a wife and anything. That's the arrangement we have. I have a wife, and she's cool. And also I have anything I want.

I'm a mom first. That's all I really care about - being a good mom and a good wife. The writing always comes second for me.

It's like Tiger Woods' wife, we should take a nine iron to the back windshield of big government spending and smash it out.

Pittacus said, "Every one of you hath his particular plague, and my wife is mine; and he is very happy who hath this only".

Nathan always believed his wife was trying to poison him but he didn't seem to mind. He said it made life kind of exciting.

She’s best friends with my wife. (Julian) Gracie? You’re married to Gracie? That was you? You’re Mr. Hot Bottom! (Sunshine)

A woman should be able to kiss a man beautifully and romantically without any desire to be either his wife or his mistress.

Bluebeard, who said to Scottland Yard, How do I know how many wives I've killed? I'm not an accountant! Never got a dinner!

Here is the solution to the American drug problem suggested a couple years back by the wife of our President: "Just say no.

It's a funny kind of month, October. For the really keen cricket fan it's when you discover that your wife left you in May.

I really enjoy sailing on Lake Geneva because I can just look at the shore and see my wife having a barbecue with the kids.

It's harder being a woman director because on the whole women don't have husbands or boyfriends who are willing to be wives

The argument between wives and whores is an old one; each one thinking that whatever she is, at least she is not the other.

Share This Page