Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
If a tree falls in the forest and kills your ex-wife, what do you do with the lumber?
Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day.
I've always found it much more dangerous to fool with a man's mistress than his wife.
In private I'm not. You will have to ask my wife. She maintains I'm a fluffy husband.
It takes as much discipline to be a mother and a wife as it does to do anything else.
With my wife I get no respect. I fell asleep with a cigarette in my hand. She lit it.
You’re far too prickly tempered to be a mistress. You’re far better suited as a wife.
Recipe for a happy marriage: My wife and I always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
I had made her so unhappy that she had developed a sense of humor. [-Rabo Karabekian]
My wife and I went to a hotel where we got a waterbed. My wife called it the Dead Sea.
I can't be a wife. I'm not that sort of person. Wives have to compromise all the time.
I don't want to be a great chief executive without being a great mum and a great wife.
The reason modern poetry is difficult is so that the poet's wife cannot understand it.
The amount of times my wife has rolled her eyes at board games is impossible to count.
In Biblical times, a man could have as many wives as he could afford. Just like today.
I have four children and nine grandchildren. I'm presently wearing out my second wife.
It's a marriage. If I had to choose between my wife and my putter, well, I'd miss her.
I cannot forbid a person to marry several wives, for it does not contradict Scripture.
I do not refer to myself as a 'housewife' for the reason that I did not marry a house.
Men will bear many things from a kept mistress, which they would not bear from a wife.
My wife and I have a tradition of popcorn and videos with our kids on Friday evenings.
I'm a wife and a mother. I don't want to be immature; I have to be ready at all times.
Being bilingual is like having a wife and a mistress. One can never be sure of either.
Nobody is free… Everyone has a prison. Wife, parents, children, they all make prisons.
Always accepting the greatest joy of all is the time that I get to spend with my wife.
I tell ya, my wife's a lousy cook. After dinner, I don't brush my teeth. I count them.
My wife was delighted with the home I had given her amid the prairies of the far west.
When we got married my wife told me I was one in a million. I found out she was right.
What a generous thing that is, I realize, for a husband to try to make his wife laugh.
Women are at last becoming persons first and wives second, and that is as it should be.
Mickey Mouse was supposed to be called Mortimer, but Walt Disney’s wife found it creepy
God designed husbands and wives to complete each other, not to compete with each other.
You will discover 3 trustworthy mates, an aged wife, an aged canine, and ready dollars.
My wife is amazing. She had to know she was getting into a heap of trouble when we met.
That is, the wife must care for what the husband cares for if he is to remain resolute.
Last year my wife ran off with the fellow next door and I must admit, I still miss him.
I can't go too much into my domestic life because there are ex-wives ready to do me in.
Lynn, my wife, would very much appreciate if I had a talent for anything besides music.
I can't get my wife to agree with me on everything or my kids to agree with everything.
My wife can't cook at all. She made chocolate mousse. An antler got stuck in my throat.
On top of the horror of separating from your wife, you have to go through it in public.
First get an absolute conquest over thyself, and then thou wilt easily govern thy wife.
I know at the beginning of our careers, my wife and I were gut wrenchingly competitive.
In a happy marriage it is the wife who provides the climate, the husband the landscape.
I began seeing my wife, Kathleen, while I was undergoing treatment for prostate cancer.
I'm marrying my common-law wife, Beth, the Christian way, with a preacher and all that.
I live by my own rules (reviewed, revised, and approved by my wife).. but still my own.
A mother is a mother all of your life,but a father is a father only when he has a wife.
If a man truly wants to communicate with his wife, he must enter her world of emotions.
Jack Sprat could eat no fat,His wife could eat no lean. A real sweet pair of neurotics.