The only time some fellows are seen with their wives is after they're indicted.

If a politician isn't doing it to his wife , then he's doing it to his country.

It is okay to cut your wife's throat as long as you are rich, famous—and black.

There's a lot more historical baggage to deal with as a wife than as a partner.

Yes, I shot my wife because I thought she was Bigfoot, but I'm from New Jersey.

My wife and I have always trusted each other, and I have to thank her strength.

Body and soul, like peevish man and wife, United jar, and yet are loth to part.

And I'd love to direct. One day. I'm learning a lot on the set of The Good Wife.

I listened to 19 guilty verdicts for my wife and me. And all I could do was sob.

I work hard to let my wife know how much I love her. I try to do that every day.

Humor is falling downstairs if you do it in the act of telling your wife not to.

It's not a good idea to put your wife into a novel; not your latest wife anyway.

I like to joke with my wife that she's the CEO of... certainly of our household.

My wife is Dutch and very independent. She never wanted or needed to be married.

If I was your wife Sir, I'd poison you! Madam, if you were my wife, I'd let you!

Anyone could write a novel given six weeks, pen paper, and no telephone or wife.

You might be a redneck if your wife has a beer belly and you find it attractive.

Oh, I suppose my wife and I will open a bottle of champagne with another couple.

Why bother with Google when I have a wife who knows everything about everything!

My wife assures me she didn't sleep with Tiger Woods, but how can I believe her?

I discovered the wife's got asthma. Thank God - I thought she was hissing at me.

Well, you know, my wife and I have eight children. We have now 19 grandchildren.

Well, my wife and I were married in a toilet - it was a marriage of convenience!

In my life as a wife and mother, I'm always conscious of my desire to be present.

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

I have often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming.

I was in love with my wife and she was in love with me. We got along wonderfully.

Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success.

There is trouble with a wife, but it's even worse with a woman who is not a wife.

The cave-dweller's wife complained that he hadn't dragged her anywhere in months.

I just can't see myself as a trophy wife. I can't imagine not having my own life.

Anyone who is friends with Bill Clinton shouldn't be telling their wife about it.

I'd never be unfaithful to my wife for the reason that I love my house very much.

I chose my wife, as she did her wedding gown, for qualities that would wear well.

Most men need their wives to need them, and I've seen that lead to their downfall

A man is known by his conduct to his wife, to his family, and to those under him.

My wife accuses me - and she's probably right - that I'm sometimes oversensitive.

They say that I'm stubborn, and my wife says that, too, but it's paid off so far.

If your wife locks you out of the house, you don't have a problem with your door.

My wife, Tania, is very big on dogs, so I'm always paying out to animal charities.

A man does not buy his wife a fur coat to keep her warm, but to keep her pleasant.

To be a trophy wife, you have to be a trophy. I am more of a commemorative plaque.

I'm lucky to have been blessed with a great family and a wonderful Christian wife.

My wife has to be the worst cook. I've got the only dog who begs for alka-seltzer.

My priority, the most important thing in my life is my family, my wife and my son.

When my wife died, I booked myself into the studio just to work, to occupy myself.

You can always tell how a man will treat his wife by the way he treats his mother.

One shouldn't be too inquisitive in life Either about God's secrets or one's wife.

The soul's a sort of sentimental wife, That prays and whimpers of the higher life.

You may have even an ex-wife or an ex-husband, but you can never have ex-children.

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