Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
Successful crimes alone are justified.
We do not take humor seriously enough.
Death is a distant rumor to the young.
What do gardeners do when they retire?
Every law is an infraction of liberty.
The weasel under the cocktail cabinet.
Keep good relations with the Grecians.
I'm an atheist and I thank God for it.
Kent Abbott is in the on-deck circuit.
If it doesn't sell, it isn't creative.
Are you shooting webs of stupid at me?
The ballgame is over...in this inning.
My son is 21. He'll be 22 if I let him.
Nostalgia: How long's that been around?
You have the sex appeal of Norman Fell.
A day without laughter is a day wasted.
Well, honor is the subject of my story.
Are you Polish? Okay, I'll talk slower.
I'm a sucker for a good sense of humor.
Reading is the basics for all learning.
The last man that makes a joke owns it.
Somehow I enjoy watching people suffer.
You know what keeps me humble? Mirrors!
I smoke to fill the potholes in my soul
Our nation must come together to unite.
Four years ago... no, it was yesterday.
Don't buy the toys that make the noise!
Funniness is the wild card in the pack.
Nothing like a little judicious levity.
They have miscalculated me as a leader.
I invented the cordless extension cord.
Was Einstein's theory good? Relatively.
Figure out what to do, then take a nap.
I eat Swiss cheese from the inside out.
Just relax and breathe through your ass.
I have a fax machine with "fax waiting".
Dogs are forever in the push up postion.
It's a base hit on the error by Roberts.
One parody is worth a thousand polemics.
Humor is to get us over terrible things.
Never slap a man who is chewing tobacco.
It's hard to force creativity and humor.
I just am a snob when it comes to humor.
I expect you to work hard on our agenda.
We go where our deepest desires take us.
Do feminists have a sense of humor? Yes.
Cricket is basically baseball on valium.
Kippers : fish that like a lot of sleep.
A pound of pluck is worth a ton of luck.
Gonzo leaps like a giraffe and grabs it.