It was a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy to thank her for it.

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.

Agriculture not only gives riches to a nation, but the only riches she can call her own.

A woman must make her fortune before she is 30; or work after she is 30; or get married.

My first proper kiss was from Cara Shucksmith when I was 13 or 14 at her birthday party.

A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.

I love pizza. I want to marry it, but it would just be to eat her family at the wedding.

During all these years there existed within me a tendency to follow Nature in her walks.

Directing her was like directing Lassie. You need 14 takes to get each one of them right.

Karen Carpenter was just a singularly amazing singer. There was just not anybody like her.

A bride at her second marriage does not wear a veil. She wants to see what she is getting.

Nature knows no pause in progress and development, and attaches her curse on all inaction.

Who never doubted, never half believed. Where doubt is, there truth is - it is her shadow.

When a man has once loved a woman he will do anything for her except continue to love her.

She's always there for me when I need her; She's my best friend; she's just my everything.

What amazes me is that the whole world is fascinated by Kim Kardashian. What's her talent?

My mother-in-law's so fat that when she passes her handbag from hand to hand she throws it.

My mother told me to be a lady. And for her, that meant be your own person, be independent.

The silver swan, who, living had no note, When death approached unlocked her silent throat.

A woman is like a tea bag - you can't tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water.

My mother made wonderful cheesecake. She loved cheesecake. She ate it every day of her life.

No matter how old a mother is she watches her middle-aged children for signs of improvement.

No self-respecting woman should wish or work for the success of a party who ignores her sex.

Let the wife make the husband glad to come home, and let him make her sorry to see him leave.

A beautiful woman must expect to be more accountable for her steps, than one less attractive.

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.

Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house.

A woman watches her body uneasily, as though it were an unreliable ally in the battle for love.

An employee's motivation is a direct result of the sum of interactions with his or her manager.

A woman, the more curious she is about her face, is commonly the more careless about her house.

Now, it's true I married my wife for her looks... but not the ones she's been givin' me lately.

The proletarian woman fights hand in hand with the man of her class against capitalist society.

The best way a mentor can prepare another leader is to expose him or her to other great people.

If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest.

Horror movies are the best date movies. There's no wondering, 'When do I put my arm around her?'

Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing.

I've been snowboarding my whole life. My wife's really good, and I just try to keep up with her.

If a tie is like kissing your sister, losing is like kissing you grandmother with her teeth out.

In a recent Valentine's Day posting on her fan website, Britney Spears says that - oh, who cares?

A woman telling her true age is like a buyer confiding his final price to an Armenian rug dealer.

I've always had such a high level of respect for Taylor Swift because she writes all of her music.

I told my mother-in-law that my house was her house, and she said, 'Get the hell off my property.'

I would like to be Maria, but there is La Callas who demands that I carry myself with her dignity.

I often joke that 100 years from now I hope people are saying, 'Dang, she looks good for her age!'

If a man sees a woman with red lipstick, he admires her, but often he won't feel like kissing her.

Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house.

Truth never comes into the world but like a bastard, to the ignominy of him that brought her birth.

When I play with my cat, who knows whether she is not amusing herself with me more than I with her.

Her angel's face, As the great eye of heaven shined bright, And made a sunshine in the shady place.

My notion of a wife at 40 is that a man should be able to change her, like a bank note, for two 20s.

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