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With any long-term relationship, you have good days and bad days.
Y'know, every relationship is different. There are good marriages, bad marriages, connected partners, unconnected partners.
It's just like any relationship, the more contained the environment, the more the good stuff appears and the more the bad stuff will reveal itself.
Kicking is like a love-hate relationship. When it's going good it's really good. When it's bad, it's really tough. You just have to find the fine line between not getting too high or too low.
Rules help govern and steer a relationship along, so they're good things. But they become bad things when they become the narrow gate though which the relationship must always pass. When this happens, the rules become the basis for the relationship and, in a sense, become a substitute for the relationship.