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It's far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help.
I don't think roles help you resolve your issues. I just think they're good markers.
As a wing back, when you get the ball wide, you usually don't have any help out wide. You have to be pretty good on your own out there.
There are only two guidelines in good sex, don't do anything you don't really enjoy and find out what are your partner needs and don't balk them if you can help it.