Isn't it fun to go out on the course and lie in the sun?

Golf is a non-violent game played violently from within.

The person I fear most in the last two rounds is myself.

Concentrating for four hours will wear you out mentally.

If there is any larceny in a man, golf will bring it out.

No one who ever had lessons would have a swing like mine.

Just have a Coke or something and watch the boys go past.

Most people play a fair game of golf - if you watch them.

I'm not very good in the rain. I don't wear a golf glove.

Golf tip: Lay off for three weeks and then quit for good.

I don't care about that. The Green Coat is enough for me.

Putts get real difficult the day they hand out the money.

The word is control. That's my ultimate - to have control.

Tee your ball high...air offers less resistance than dirt.

I'm quite good at golf. I'm not amazing, but I play a lot.

Do I have to know rules and all that crap? Then forget it.

If a caddie can help you, you don't know how to play golf.

I would rather play Hamlet with no rehearsal than TV golf.

One travels like a golf ball, hopping from green to green.

To Sally, who showed me the benefits of the sport of golf.

Mr. Agnew, I believe you have a slight swing in your flaw.

It's a funny thing, the more I practice the luckier I get.

That divot is so deep, I will need a sod cutter to fix it.

I have only one goal in golf - to leave it with my sanity.

I don't think it's healthy to take yourself too seriously.

Retire to what? I already play golf and fish for a living.

There has to be a better use for titanium than golf clubs.

I always think under par. You have to believe in yourself.

Thinking instead of acting is the number one golf disease.

It's a really good place for me to be, on the golf course.

I can sum it up like this: Thank God for the game of golf.

Your worst putt will usually be as good as your best chip.

Concentrate on hitting the green. The cup will come to you.

What is Love compared with holing out before your opponent?

The ultimate judge of your swing is the flight of the ball.

My swing is so bad I look like a caveman killing his lunch.

I hate golf! I still can't believe Alice Cooper plays golf!

There are no maladies in my golf game. My golf game stinks.

Golf courses sell real estate and that's why they're built.

This is one of the most special golf courses in the planet.

It is impossible to outplay an opponent you can't outthink.

There is no room on the golf course for anger or self-pity.

Golf is just a game - and an idiotic game most of the time.

Nicklaus plays a kind of golf with which I am not familiar.

I'm glad I brought this course, this monster, to its knees.

Golf is like smoking, I have been trying to quit for years.

Golf is the loneliest of games, not excluding postal chess.

That's life. The older you get, the tougher it is to score.

If you think golf is relaxing, you're not playing it right.

I'm getting so old, I don't even buy green bananas anymore.

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