Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
Gag me with a spoon!
I'm like a sight gag.
I do not favor the gag order.
In the end, everything is a gag.
I love a quick little magician gag.
Earnestness makes British people gag.
I don't like sweet, warm beverages. It makes me gag!
I'm not the guy to ask about politics. I'm a gag writer.
I started out with three creative jobs - painter, janitor and gag writer.
The modern horror audience is wise to our tricks this lets it in on the gag.
My dream in life is to write the one gag that makes everyone in the world laugh.
'Sex and The City' had very strong gag orders as to what we could say and not say.
If the gag is complicated, you spend more time thinking about the way you're drawing it.
I've seen many imitations on 'Gag Concert' and other programs, too, and I've been watching happily.
I have allergic reactions: it triggers my gag reflex when I read unrealistic dialogue from a teenager.
I go around the country and do a simple gag like, 'The property ladder is now a snake' and get a real laugh.
I thought Twitter was a joke. I really thought it was a gag. I thought it was like National Lampoon or the Onion.
Broccoli, when overboiled, produces a sulfuric stench that causes children to gag the instant they enter the house.
And there is no finer moment, when I sit in a screening, and the parents and the kids are all laughing at the same gag.
A page a day means I need to focus on a gag a day, and that's great for laughs but bad for plot, and I'm primarily a plot guy.
For a long time, I've loved the kind of characters who are boastful yet petty. I was originally a gag manga artist, after all.
I would have been an essayist in the 18th century. Maybe I'd have had one gag in the piece, but essentially I'd be saying something.
I honestly do feel - and I hope I don't gag anybody if they read this - but I feel like I'm one of the luckiest people in the world.
I apply the three gag rule, which is if I can read a script without gagging more than three times, then maybe I can say yes to this job.
Raw parsley makes me gag. It's the same for my mum and my sister. Which is funny because apparently parsley was used to suffocate witches, back in the day.
If we can but tear the blindfold of self-deception from our eyes and loosen the gag of self-denial from our voices, we can restore our country to greatness.
Any of us in the public eye must remember: Never, ever believe your own press, and pray to develop a hypersensitive gag reflex regarding your own importance.
I read every book about Buster Keaton and Chaplin to see how they worked - it's all about dedication, tunnel vision, pursuit of perfection, getting the gag right.
To my family and friends, I'm very definitely a clown. But do you know what? Doing a drama would almost seem easy because I wouldn't need to find that gag in a line.
The nice thing about gag manga is how it has this aspect where, at the very least, you're permitted to come out with anything. In my case, anything can talk. Like the mountains.
In America, they have this nauseating habit of calling the conductor 'maestro'. I always slightly gag when the cor anglais player goes, 'Maestro, can I discuss bar 19 with you?'
How can you tell a story with one frame that, by its simplicity, manages to tell a story, a gag that evokes an emotion in you? That became my motto throughout all my life. Simplicity.
I am kind of a freak of nature who has loose joints, and I was able to put my legs behind my head, and it looked weird to people when I was a kid, so I kept doing it. It's a great party gag.
I would like to thank the people who encouraged me to draw army cartoons at a time when the gag man's conception of the army was one of mean ole sergeants and jeeps which jump over mountains.
There is a lot of rubbish written about toilet humour - people saying it is childish and pretending it is beneath them - but there is no doubting the effectiveness of a really good willy gag.
There's a standard pay scale for stunts. The more difficult the stunt, the more money involved. But if I'm the only stuntman who can do a particular gag, there's usually a little more in it for me.
Being a talented artist is good, it's nice, but it's not the most important thing. I think being a good storyteller, having a good idea, a good gag, is probably more important than being a great artist.
I just don't want to live like I used to. And at some point, I'm going to put a gag order on myself in terms of talking about the past. I've got to slam the door and deal with the present and the future.
Whenever I catch a chunk of an Adam Sandler comedy on cable, it looks as badly shot and goofily tossed off as a Jerry Lewis gag reel once he hit the late downslide with 'Hardly Working' and 'Cracking Up.'
Sometimes, you start with the drawing and then the gag comes to you in the middle of it. That is when you start working on the solution of the gag, which is composition, placing, equilibrium, and character design.
Nobody gets any fun out of baseball any more. I guess a kid's crazy not to be serious about it when he's drawing down $20,000 or $30,000 a year, and any smart-aleck gag you try may be your last. But what's life without a laugh?
There are some things that I write that I know are personal in a way, or the gag is so obscure that it's just for me, and there's other things that could basically be for anybody or be anything, at least until the lyrics start to get written.
Presenting the Oscars was the most nerve-racking job I have ever done in show business. It's very much a live show: they have comedy writers waiting in the wings, and as you come off between presentations, they hand you an appropriate gag to tell.
I enjoyed doing the gag covers better than the story ones because they were usually simpler. A cover based on an incident in the plot took a great deal of staging to tell a little story that was still part of the book. And it had to make sense on its own.
'Animal House' was my first movie, so I didn't have anything to compare it to. I was a sight gag more than anything else. So I can't say it was one of those things where your life changes. When the movie came out, I had to ask for the night off at the bar.
There is that stereotype of a nerd with the high pants and pocket protector and that kind of thing. That can sustain comedy for maybe a movie - hence the 'Revenge of the Nerds' franchise - but not for hopefully years on the air. It's a sight gag, not a story.
We used to indulge hopelessly as a family at Christmas. When the children were little, I dressed up as Father Christmas. They knew it was a gag, but they loved it. I remember stealing into their bedrooms at 1 A.M. and filling the stockings up at the end of the bed.
Right before the Bush inauguration, many women were greatly reassured when Laura said of Roe v. Wade on the 'Today' show, 'No, I don't think it should be overturned.' Three days later, her husband reimposed the 'global gag rule' on groups abroad that receive U.S. funding for family planning.
Homosexuality is like an inside baseball thing. It's like a gag that people share; 'How is your husband?' But when it comes to bringing diversity to a broader audience, suddenly it's a different road. It's what we call 'a risk.' Isn't it our responsibility to elevate the standards and change people's perceptions?
I'm a sucker for gag reels and teaser trailers for new seasons. One of the great parts of panels, especially on a show like 'Supernatural,' which can be so dark, it's fun to get up there and laugh and remember we're only telling a story. Seeing Eric Kripke and Ben Edlund up there being so funny always makes me laugh.