Why do more than 40 percent of Americans think that the Universe began after the domestication of the dog?

To take the nuts from the fire with the dogges foot. [To take the nuts from the fire with the dog's foot.]

A dog is grateful for what is, which I am finding to be the soundest kind of wisdom and very good theology.

If you want to imagine the future, imagine a boy and his dog and his friends. And a summer that never ends.

Time and again, the Faith has to all appearances gone to the dogs. But each time, it was the dog that died.

I like being able to go to a local pub and have great food and particularly love pubs that welcome my dogs.

I do not believe that a dog can be cured by a psychiatrist, but I think some owners could be helped by one.

An ancient father says that a dog we know is better company than a man whose language we do not understand.

was a clear, pale blue like the eyes of a Siberian husky dog. Human beings just didn't have eyes like that.

The most valuable lesson man has learned from his dog is to kick a few blades of grass over it and move on.

When I have no appointments, I spend the day in pajamas and go to the dog park in pajamas. I'm very casual.

How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg.

My children are all doing just fine. The mountain dogs are great in this weather. The yorkies are freezing.

Like the dog who barks at the train, I bark not because I expect the train to stop, but because I am a dog.

I don't think anyone would care about my private life because I don't do anything. I'm at home with my dog.

We treat our dogs as if they were "almost human": that is why they really become "almost human" in the end.

I spent half my life being hurt. The leftovers of hurt are an automatic gesture, like a dog that salivates.

When a really cute dog shows up on your doorstep, you can't be like, Yeah, no. You're like, Oh, yay, puppy!

Dogs have more love than integrity. They've been true to us, yes, but they haven't been true to themselves.

There is no more off-leash reliable, calm, sophisticated, go-with-you-anywhere dog than a trained sheepdog.

The dog is man's best friend. He has a tail on one end. Up in front he has teeth. And four legs underneath.

The dog has no ambition, no self-interest, no desire for vengeance, no fear other than that of displeasing.

A dog doesn't want very much and is happy with that. A cat doesn't know what he wants and wants more of it.

No babies for me until I'm in my 30s! I'm focused on my career right now. I can't even take care of my dog.

I have caught more ills from people sneezing over me and giving me virus infections than from kissing dogs.

Our dogs will love and admire the meanest of us, and feed our colossal vanity with their uncritical homage.

Joyful, joyful, joyful, as only dogs know how to be happy with only the autonomy of their shameless spirit.

A dog, however nice he is, and sweet-tempered, doesn't have much of a range of options. A human being does.

I usually write in my underwear, with a space heater running full blast, and three dogs sleeping at me feet.

You can't teach an old dog new dog new tricks. Now,you can give an old dog new toys. And we've got one here!

What I used to do between writing fits was feed my kids, ride my horse and go shopping for cat and dog food.

Older people exude bundles of sexuality. Older men and women tend not run around like cats and dogs in heat.

My dog has a cough. If you've never seen a dog with a cough, I recommend trying to find one. It's hilarious.

The only thing I can say about W. C. Fields ... is this: Any man who hates dogs and babies can't be all bad.

The human body has no more need for cows' milk than it does for dogs' milk, horses' milk, or giraffes' milk.

When I go home, I play with my baby dolls and strollers and stuffed animals, pretend like they're real dogs.

We know that this mad dog of the Middle East has a goal of a world revolution. (On Muammar Qaddafi of Libya)

What does it matter if a few barking dogs snap at the heels of the weary travelers? ... The caravan moves on

It is not the drinker, but the man who has just stopped drinking, who thinks the world is going to the dogs.

Politicians are always interested in people. Not that this is always a virtue. Fleas are interested in dogs.

I used to be called 'a Mexican guy who can walk a pack of dogs.' Now the world calls me 'The Dog Whisperer'.

You can't fix stupid. You can't fix a neutered dog you can't fix a garage door and hey, you can't fix stupid

We shall see that at which dogs howl in the dark, and that at which cats prick up their ears after midnight.

My wife and I love to read. Were going to have to move out to make room for the books! And we have our dogs.

They had a... dog called Bluey. A know psychopath, Bluey would attack himself if nothing else was available.

Number one way life would be different if dogs ran the world: All motorists must drive with head out window.

I walk my dogs. I garden a little. I play a bit of tennis. Basically when I have spare time I'm making music.

Come on soldiers! Guardians and agents of the supreme law! Here is a sacrifice of dogs ready for your swords!

I would like to own a dog in the future. I think it would be a big step for me in the rehabilitation process.

People gave me such a bad time about wanting a baby. I didn't want a baby, and I still don't. I wanted a dog.

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