Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
I think one of the things helping Donald Trump is, he hasn't known what he can't do. It's not in his vernacular. It's not in his vocabulary. It's not in his way of thinking what he can't do, what you're not supposed to do.
Our obligation is to ourselves and obligating to ourselves the job of defending and protecting America is how we serve other people around the world, not by letting this country go to hell. We are under no such obligation.
President Obama didn't even want to try to keep the jobs at Carrier, for whatever reason. Maybe he didn't want to even roll up his sleeves and work with the people there. Maybe he resents them 'cause they're a corporation.
I really think what's happening to the American political system is that it has been reduced to a system of self-perpetuation for the people in it. And they view security for themselves as always needing things to be done.
Hillary Clinton announced she's running for president. Yesterday in Ohio, Hillary popped into a Chipotle and she ordered a burrito bowl with chips and salsa. And on her way out she said, 'That locks down the Hispanic vote.'
The Oscars are this Sunday. Host Neil Patrick Harris said he hopes the broadcast will include a 'Kanye moment.' Unfortunately a Kanye moment may not be possible because that would require a black person to be at the Oscars.
Yesterday the DEA raided several NFL teams suspected of giving prescription painkillers to their players. In its defense, the New York Jets' doctor said, 'We don't give painkillers to our players. We give them to our fans.'
Kim Kardashian tweeted that she is supporting President Obama in the midterm elections. I think it worked because all of the polls are predicting that after tonight Barack Obama will still be president of the United States.
President Obama announced his re-election campaign, though it’s not really a surprise. He did all the things that make it official: He filed the paperwork, redesigned his website, and printed another fake birth certificate.
And tar is washing up onto the beaches - big globs of tar. And people are saying, 'Is that going to ruin our summer at the beach?' No, of course not. You take the big blobs of tar and you use them to hold down your blanket.
Stocks are at an all-time high today. I don't have any money in the stock market. I don't have the stomach for the ups and downs. So about 20 years ago I put all of my money and liquid assets into videotape rewind machines.
There's a reason people are not going to Obamacare. They find out what it's gonna cost 'em, and they go somewhere else. And in the process, they're undermining the very foundation of Obamacare, all of which was predictable.
I think a lot of people who go to drama school have this ease with the text and they all have five monologues that they know by heart, and I never had that. I've done Chekov and I've done Moliere and I've done classic stuff
Hillary Clinton is making income inequality a central theme in her campaign. Yeah, for example, today she pointed out that her husband makes $300 million a year. She has to get by on $200 million a year, and that's not fair.
Good luck finding a place to park in New York City. And when you do, good luck figuring out the parking signs, restrictions, and prohibitions. It is so complicated. It has gotten so bad, I never park my car without a lawyer.
They found a cave once lived in by Osama bin Laden and the only thing in the cave were some boxer undershorts, and macaroni. I'm telling you, you add an old stack of Playboys, this could be my place. It's like I have a twin.
If you're going to run around, Ms. Pelosi, and you're going to say Republicans like the war, then can we also assume that Democrats like killing babies? Put that in whatever it is you smoke, Ms. Pelosi, and have fun with it.
With every issue, the coverage of [Barack] Obama is: "Will he get? How will he look? Does this help or does this hurt Obama?" There's never any questioning of what he wants in terms of is it good, bad for the country or not.
There are smart people on our side of the aisle who have known as early as I did who Obama was and should have been saying 'I hope this guy fails' right along with me. There should have been opposition to this guy all along.
Militant feminists are pro-choice because it's their ultimate avenue of power over men. And believe me, to them it is a question of power. It is their attempt to impose their will on the rest of society, particularly on men.
There is no immigration policy in the US that is permitting what's happening. What's happening here is happening outside the law, that our leaders do not wish to enforce or acknowledge. And the same thing happened in the UK.
I know a lot of Millennial women who don't listen to the program, anyway, when you mention my name - they've heard so much gunk and so many things that are not true - they say, "I never listen to that!" Say, "You've got to."
There's not much more to do on the gay agenda. They got gay marriage, and we're close to putting you in jail if you won't bake a cake for a gay wedding. We've got pretty much everything, but you have to keep the group happy.
Dr. Ben Carson is a first-class human being and citizen. He is exactly the kind of person that you could trust running any government institution. You would trust him to babysit your kids. He's just an admirable human being.
The active Trump supporter is the Trumpster who can tell you exactly why. And if you tell the active Trump supporter that you don't, he will try to convince you to change your mind. That's an active Trump voter or supporter.
They want people to believe the Constitution says that if you are born to on a illegal alien mother, that you are automatically an American citizen. They want to insist that that's what the Constitution says, but it doesn't.
There are few things more liberating in this life than having your worst fear realized... Your path at 22 will not necessarily be your path at 32 or 42. One's dream is constantly evolving, rising and falling, changing course.
President Obama has appointed a transgender woman to a position in the Department of Commerce. You know, in this era of partisan bickering, President Obama deserves a lot of credit for taking a chance on Ann Coulter, I think.
A new report just came out that says President Obama has mentioned Jesus Christ in more speeches than President Bush did. Can you believe that? Still, neither has used the phrase 'Oh God, oh God,' more than President Clinton.
Prince William's pregnant wife, Kate Middleton, is past her due date. Doctors may have to induce labor. To speed up the birth, doctors have been telling the baby, 'Come on out. You will never have to work a day in your life.'
If you feed them, if you feed the children, three square meals a day during the school year, how can you expect them to feed themselves in the summer? ... Wanton little waifs and serfs dependent on the State. Pure and simple.
These are people that are gonna vote for Hillary Clinton. They couldn't care less that she is sleazy. They couldn't care less that she cannot tell the truth. They couldn't care less that she exposes this nation to great risk.
Trump has a connection with his voters that most politicians don't have. I understand it perhaps better than anybody in media, and that connection that he has is not anything that anybody else can break. Only he can break it.
Donald Trump is a way for people to get a message to the media: "You're not fooling us anymore. We don't respect you. We don't like you. We have resented deeply what you've tried to do to us and our candidates, so take this."
The UK population became, for lack of a better term, Balkanized. And then all of a sudden Sharia mosques started popping up all over the place. And before you knew it, the most popular or frequent male baby name was Mohammed.
I have a story here, and it dovetails with this. You won't believe this. At Ohio State, the Ohio State University, you have to know the rules before you decide to kiss somebody. Both sides have to know the rules. Not kidding.
The Democrats are incapable of even being accused of violating political correctness, so they don't even worry about it. The Democrats have really grown accustomed, however, to Republicans not attacking, not criticizing them.
It just so happens that most of the Democrats happen to be aligned with the "America is the problem in the world" side. And most of the pro-Trumpers happen to believe that America is the solution to the problems in the world.
It has become cliché to say I laughed until I cried, but when I'm done reading one of [Kupperman's] underground comics my shirt is literally soaking wet. This guy may have one of the best comedy brains on the planet right now.
President Obama said the small drone that flew over the White House fence yesterday could be bought at any RadioShack. After hearing this, the RadioShack CEO said, 'I'm shocked to find out we still sell something people want.'
The New York Times reports that Moammar Gadhafi spent his last days hovering between defiance and delusion, surviving on rice and pasta. In other words, Gadhafi spent his last days as a sophomore in college. That's what I did.
I can't wait to see the debate between Ryan and Joe Biden. Biden is said to be already trying out different strategies. So far the one that Obama likes is where Biden pretends to have food poisoning and they cancel the debate.
Jeb Bush has to distance himself from what they call the Bush brand. So he keeps saying, 'I am my own man.' But when Governor Chris Christie is out on the campaign trail, he's always saying, 'I'm my own man, plus another guy.'
The Republican Party, I really believe, suffers from post-traumatic stress disorder from years and years of bullying and taunting. The Republican Party is Jonathan Martin. The Democrat Party and the media are Richie Incognito.
Go into business, sell a product, sell a service, you're automatically a suspect to people like Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton - unless you donate to them, and then you become their closest friends, and then we get cronyism.
It's precisely because America is not a democracy that we have survived! It's precisely because majority rule does have checks and balances on it. It's precisely because this is a representative republic that we have survived.
You have people talk about the media as a coequal branch when talking about Republicans. "You know, Republicans have to overcome the media, and then the Democrats." Wait a minute. Why should anybody have to overcome the media?
"Consent must be freely given, can be withdrawn at any time, and the absence of 'no' does not mean 'yes.'" How many of you guys, in your own experience with women, have learned that "no" means "yes" if you know how to spot it?
I know that some people believe Winston Churchill, magnanimity in victory. I've always believed magnanimity in defeat and then sneak up on 'em when they're not looking when you fire back. That's what I've always - magnanimity.
I'm aware of everything - it's my job - I keep up to speed, and I have a blessed memory. The brain chemistry I have is such that my memory is wonderful. And sometimes it's helpful, and other times it ends up being frustrating.