Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
If Thomas Jefferson thought taxation without representation was bad, he should see how it is with representation.
Obamacare ruined and destroyed or set in motion the ruination and destruction of the American health care system.
We've arrived at a point where the President of the United States is going to lead a war on traditional marriage.
Hillary's [Clinton] been doing a good job of portraying [Donald] Trump as unqualified, not the right temperament.
I just wanted to be a guy on the radio and I wanted to succeed, and I wanted a situation where I could be honest.
We're never gonna move forward if we can't let go of things, especially things that don't happen to people today.
Getting a lot of applause, announcing military reforms and upgrades. It's a really good speech [of Donald Trump].
Tucker Carlson has the new seven p.m. show on Fox and right now it may be the most interesting and engaging show.
Public schools teaching students to hate America as the left appeases Muslims with "religious literacy training."
Liberalism is [ CNN infobabes] religion; it's all a matter of faith. Nobody attacking it is gonna be listened to.
Now we have Republicans - to one degree or another - working as hard as the Democrats are to defeat Donald Trump.
Obamacare is not about health care. Obamacare is about the expansion of government and the total loss of freedom.
Liberalism has consequences. It has never worked, folks. It has never worked! It has never fulfilled its promise.
I'm a big believer in going on offense, and I think Hillary Clinton is the ideal target on whom to go on offense.
The Republican Party has steadfastly sided with its donors and its lobbyists, and this is why we're where we are.
We are born to action; and whatever is capable of suggesting and guiding action has power over us from the first.
Obama's only attempt to unify the country was to unify people who believe that his enemies need to be eliminated.
In the Year 2000 the discovery of extraterrestrial life will create a revolution in science, art, and pornography.
The first thing men notice about a woman is her eyes. Then, when her eyes aren't looking, they notice her breasts.
There is no Thanksgiving back in the old country where I come from. You know why? Because being thankful is a sin.
For a while, some schools across the country were banning spelling bees. For obvious reasons, of course - steroids
At CBS, I’m in your house. I’m mindful of that. When I do standup, you’re in my home and I can say what I want to.
I think holidays create so much pressure because people feel they should be having a good time. But you shouldn't.
Even though it's warm here in L.A., people still have to wear layers - at least until their plastic surgery heals.
Jeb Bush may run for President. Bush presidencies are like 'Caddyshack' movies. They should have stopped with one.
All comedians are preoccupied with one thing and with one thing only-themmm-selllves. It's a horrible lot in life.
Now in Utah if you get the death sentence, they have the firing squad. In Russia, they call that early retirement.
They're saying President Obama doesn't have any friends. The problem is that he can't get Congress to approve one.
After my bypass surgery I knew I had to change my lifestyle, and then it occured to me - I don't have a lifestyle.
How many of you guys in your own experience with women have learned that no means yes, if you know how to spot it?
If you want to make a Conservative angry, tell him a lie. If you want to make a Liberal angry, tell him the truth.
The Democrats have to be stopped and that's going to be what ultimately brings us everybody back to sobriety here.
We can take this country back. All we need is to nominate the right candidate. It's no more complicated than that.
He always wants to expand every one's rights: illegal aliens, terrorists, Russian spies, except American citizens.
There's nobody who cares more about you than you, and there's nobody better equipped to take care of you than you.
Not getting rid of [Donald] Trump because there's a slew of Republican voters that don't want to get rid of Trump.
This immigration business has been going on in the UK much in advance of the European Union making an issue of it.
The whole idea of the first female president is not nearly as momentous or exciting as the first African-American.
America is a nation that is founded on the principle of religious freedom. That is the reason this country exists.
Donald Trump lives and operates in a political world, but he's not political. This is what people still don't get.
If no one hears you, and no one listens to you, it doesn't matter how good you are because no one cares about you.
If something touches on the world of sports, ESPN has never told me that I cannot discuss a sports-related matter.
When it comes to being visionary in stealing, the Republicans do better than anybody. It's really something to see.
I grew up in Scotland in the 1970s. There was not much money. The most popular Christmas toy was probably a potato.
The 'Star Wars' movie is coming out. Disney has kept the details of the movie under wraps because they're not Sony.
A lot of people come to L.A. looking for something. What I came here for, I realize now, is to be okay with myself.
Security here in New York City is still very tight. Hookers in Times Square now are demanding two forms of fake ID.
Krispy Kreme Doughnuts, everybody loves them. But I thought this was interesting on the box, 'Konsult Kardiologist.
Our guest tonight is Michelle Obama, first lady of the United States. She's here to announce her run for president.
Because Utah is largely Mormon country, the firing squad's a little different. You're blindfolded but no cigarette.