Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
If we knew what we were doing we wouldn't be entertaining.
I don't think we should proselytize a particular religion.
Gross negligence in handling national security is a felony.
The first couple of days on the detox diet aren't pleasant.
I live a sensible life. You know, I don't take on too much.
I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes.
Every girl likes to be thought of and made to feel special.
A man can be beaten in two ways, if he gives up or he dies.
We do have more control over our lives than any politician.
When you say "Ghetto Fights," that sounds extremely racist.
Donald Trump is a staunch believer in the Second Amendment.
In the case of Tori Spelling, there were two apology emails.
We live in an age where truth really doesn't matter anymore.
The Denver Post has actually hired an editor to promote pot.
Challenge yourself, jump off the deep end and learn to swim.
Every student of comedy should see Dame Edna at least twice.
Lawyers work hard and, like us, they're human, many of them.
Adam's impulsive and energetic, and I'm calm and methodical.
I am pretty much who I seem, and it's not a television host.
Is it that you hate this president or that you hate America?
We have got to lose the primary in order to win the general.
I'm at the age where i don't have to kiss arse or play nice!
I'm a better cook and more of a perfectionist than my mother.
Prince Harry is like the biggest international star there is.
Public misbehavior by the famous is a powerful teaching tool.
Whenever I go on a show with a comedian I just counter punch.
The photoshoot glitz and TV studio make-up isn't the real me.
It is high time SoCalGas is held responsible for its actions.
I feel accomplished knowing that I'm still the same at heart.
When you compete with good people, it makes everybody better.
My craziest ambition is to take John Madden's job and salary.
Death is never easy when you know the people doing the dying.
This country is a better place because Fox News has succeeded.
TV is my first love and I haven't disappeared from it totally.
I am taking the applause sign home, putting it in the bedroom.
More Asians need to be on television as a positive role model.
My IQ is somewhere between Spiro Agnew's and Albert Einstein's.
It takes a certain amount of guts to go to your class reunions.
The emotions in all true anxiety dreams are next to unbearable.
If you want to look young and thin, hang around old fat people.
Democracy means free television, not good television, but free.
I owe one thing to my public - the best performance I can give.
Our viewers are very educated, they can tell if I train or not.
I also love to surf the Net and talk on the phone with friends.
If you make the customer a promise... make sure you deliver it.
I grill all the time - burgers, ribs, chicken, steak, and fish.
That was like seeing a dodo and a unicorn all wrapped up in one
I said in 2008 the media is dead in America. Journalism's dead.
Dreams are really boring, but every so often I threw in a doozy.
I learned how to dance. I got a free spray tan. My life is good!