Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
I'm quite a gregarious, outgoing person.
I believe that all marijuana is medical.
I do so many roles, I can't be typecast.
I cried when I heard Johnny Carson died.
Ye Gads, no! I couldn't stand the noise.
Fields' reply: He'd think I was a sissy.
I feel today's society is so judgmental.
Voters want a fraud they can believe in.
In San Francisco, Haloween is redundant.
Humour allows people to exhale a little.
Spontaneity is what travel is all about.
My motto is "more mystery, less history".
My primary responsibility is to be funny.
Some of my stuff, I realize is just rage.
Childhood obesity affects all pedophiles.
To sustain longevity, you have to evolve.
The Lib Dems are such terrible ditherers.
Gold diggers are the wife beaters of men!
All parents experience the same problems.
Nobody ever says, "Can I have your beets?
Parenting needs to come to the forefront.
Grandparents are God's gifts to children.
A flu shot is the worst thing you can do.
I grew up watching 'Saturday Night Live.'
I just have a problem with youth culture.
I don't want to be mean. I try not to be.
I am a sponge. I don't write things down.
I like to stay at home and sit on my ass.
Who would marry me anyway? I'm a handful.
I'm a standup comedian, so I need people.
Fame is a very unnatural human condition.
I have a massive guilt thing about money.
A man is only as faithful as his options.
Canada, or as i call them, America Light.
I love getting crazy and sweaty and wild.
I live my life like there's no yesterday.
My nickname for my mom was 'The Compass.'
I can say that. I have a television show.
Cause my life is dope, and I do dope sh*t
I got a lot of positive people around me.
Comedy is a very approval-oriented field.
Mosquito bites Jesus, receives communion.
A mobile home with a flat tire is a home.
Tic Tacs are the maracas of breath mints.
I don't have credibility, I'm a comedian.
Hell hath no fury like a liberal scorned.
Matrimony is not a word, it's a sentence.
Little red cookbook! Little red cookbook!
I wanted to be less well-known in comedy.
Nothing says holidays, like a cheese log.