Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
Sometimes you lie in bed at night, and you don't have a single thing to worry about...That always worries me!
Travel tips: How to avoid carsickness, seasickness and airsickness... Be careful what you eat. And stay home.
Going to our school is an education in itself which is not to be confused with actually getting an education.
Superman's always chasing after someone who just mugged somebody, and I've never seen that happen in my life.
Coming up with ideas is really hard - they don't spontaneously pop into my head while I'm cutting vegetables.
The fuel light's on, Frank! We're all going to die! Wait, wait... Oh, my mistake - that's the intercom light.
Unless artists can remember what it was to be a little boy, they are only half complete as artist and as man.
I was very happy and honored to create the Professor Garfield Foundation with Ball State to make reading fun.
A sadder but wiser man is a thousand times more agreeable to meet than the feller that never makes a mistake.
Never tell the box-office man that you can't hear well or he will sell you a seat where you can't see either.
The library was open for one hour after school let out. I hid there, looking at art books and reading poetry.
An artists is someone who does something for the first time, something human, something that touches another.
Book dedication To myself, without whose inspired and tireless efforts this book would not have been possible.
My mother is, my father certainly was. They were kind of the local intelligentsia in the town where I grew up.
I always lived in old buildings, and I thought about who lived here before. You'd have to be oblivious not to.
Food ... love ... mother ... career ... Live every day to the fullest. Partake of the four basic guilt groups.
There are three things I have learned never to discuss with people...religion, politics and the Great Pumpkin!
Linus: Nothing goes on forever. All good things must come to an end... Charlie: When do the good things start?
I feel like a lot of my aesthetic was in response to feeling the awfulness and cheapness of that [ the 70'th].
When you're young, you don't feel iconoclastic - you're just kind of doing what seems natural, what moves you.
I was so intrigued by insects and things that crawled or flew - I could spend hours by myself in a vacant lot.
The wretcheder one is, the more one smokes; and the more one smokes, the wretcheder one gets-a vicious circle.
Last night I dreamed of a small consolation enjoyed only by the blind: Nobody knows the trouble I've not seen!
Life is like a hot bath. It feels good while you're in it, but the longer you stay, the more wrinkled you get.
"Why doesn't the fellow who says, "I'm no speechmaker," let it go at that instead of giving a demonstration? "
When you consider what a chance women have to poison their husbands, it's a wonder there isn't more of it done
Love is a perky elf dancing a merry little jig and then suddenly he turns on you with a miniature machine gun.
I would prefer to listen to a French classical composer like Olivier Messiaen than to the pop hits of the day.
Art is about the messy and marvelous business of coming to your senses - and also, to the senses of the world.
Beware of privilege. It stinks of rotten fish heads, many of which were lapping the shore beneath the jetties.
There's usually nothing in a guy's joke in which we have to understand what's going on in someone else's mind.
The Boogeyman is your conscience. The Boogeyman is the result of your own bad behavior. I love this Boogeyman.
Here is a fear for me, I never wanted to be one of those guys that was defined by a body of work 20 years old.
Kim: Hey... There's a guy over there with a samurai sword. Scott: Really? Like a katana or a wakizashi or both?
Dear Sweetheart, do you ever think of me? Just the other day I was thinking of you. I'm pretty sure it was you.
If you're going to draw a comic strip every day, you're going to have to draw on every experience in your life.
I think that's what we're all most terrified about: that we'll just die and disappear and we'll leave no trace.
Everything I do tries to do the same thing, which is to express things that are hard to express, hidden things.
Litigation: A form of hell whereby money is transferred from the pockets of the proletariat to that of lawyers.
I'll say this for adversity: people seem to be able to stand it, and that's more than I can say for prosperity.
You can't make everybody love you. It's an exercise in futility, and it's probably not even a good idea to try.
The fact that cartoons are reproduced doesn't mean anything to me as far as whether they are "real art" or not.
Sometimes I get the feeling that I'm stranded in the wrong time where love is just a lyric in a children's rhyme
A glacier will frequently move forward one foot while retreating three feet... Which reminds me a lot of myself!
What's the sense in having an eclipse if you can't look at it? Somebody in production sure slipped up this time!
If I have sometimes seemed to make fun of Woman, I assure you it has only been for the purpose of egging her on.
Some American writers who have known each other for years have never met in the daytime or when both were sober.
The notion of getting under the hood and explaining how something works, that's fairly familiar territory to me.
Marketing is about spreading ideas, and spreading ideas is the single most important output of our civilization.
Everybody just lets the media do their thinking for them... that's why you'll never hear any reggae on the radio!