Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
A biscuit in the States is something you would put gravy on with dinner, and it's not sweet in the least!
I'm convinced that the infantry is the group in the army which gives more and gets less than anybody else.
I wonder if there's such a thing as a spiritual dentist? I think my whole personality is full of cavities!
I try to take people one at a time, with all the contradictions and compromises that most of us live with.
I'm a reader of milblogs, but as with all blogs, the wheat/chaff ratio makes it a poor investment of time.
Anyone dumb enough to get his political information from a comic strip deserves what he gets at the polls.
I am not a cat man, but a dog man, and all felines can tell this at a glance - a sharp, vindictive glance.
If there's any literary ability in a feller, getting fired out of a good government job will bring it out.
My standard comment is, If you don't want your kids to be like Bart Simpson, don't act like Homer Simpson.
It's best to love your family as you would a Siberian tiger-from a distance, preferably separated by bars.
I'm a better editorial cartoonist by default because so many editorial cartoonists out there are so awful.
When a technology is replaced by another technology, the previous technology either becomes art or it dies.
Bloom County was set in a tidy, rural environment probably because of Harper Lee's 'To Kill a Mockingbird.'
Their scrambled attention spans struck me as a metaphor for the way we get our doses of reality these days.
The specifics of Cathy's and my life are different now, but the basic life challenges are exactly the same.
I have observed that whenever you try to hit somebody, there is a tendency for them to try to hit you back.
You know what I think my best quality is? I think I'm nice to have around. I'd hate it if I weren't around!
I think I've had the fantasy of a ray-gun that could erase the world from the time I was a very little kid.
The English language was carefully, carefully cobbled together by three blind dudes and a German dictionary
As soon as you go into merchandising, everyone nods sagely and says, 'Ah, now we know why you are doing it.
The wit makes fun of other persons; the satirist makes fun of the world; the humorist makes fun of himself.
A husband should not insult his wife publicly, at parties. He should insult her in the privacy of the home.
It's 2014, and adults are still writing articles about whether other adults should read comic books or not.
While Melbourne and Sydney fight about who wears Australia's cultural crown, Canberra just gets on with it.
In the dictionary, beautiful, love, amazing, and sweet all have the same definition: the definition is you.
A woman is like beer. They look good, they smell good, and you'd step over your own mother just to get one!
When I look at the smiles on all the children's faces...I just know they're about to jab me with something.
Because good writing in a TV cartoon is so rare, I think the animation on The Simpsons is often overlooked.
Pursuit is a rather desperate act in itself. There's something kind of frantic about the notion of pursuit.
Sometimes people think drawing and painting is mucking about when actually it is a highly skilled activity.
Evil is always devising more corrosive misery through man's restless need to exact revenge out of his hate.
I felt so painfully isolated that I vowed I would get revenge on the world by becoming a famous cartoonist.
My parents were extremely reluctant. When my father was clearly dying, my mother refused to acknowledge it.
I think that true horror is accomplished by slowly getting into your brain. The old way is much more scary.
Any place that anyone can learn something useful from someone with experience is an educational institution.
Unfortunately what came out of it was also kind of an imitation community with a lot of mindless conformity.
I used to be really influenced by Brian Bendis, back in his indie days. But I guess I try to tone that down.
The specific story line that people have responded to the most has been the horror of bathing suit shopping.
Linus: It was a short summer, Charlie Brown. Charlie Brown: And it looks like it's gonna be a looong winter.
I feel like I understood the language of comics. I had a real fluidity with that medium at a very early age.
When I go back and reread the stuff, I'm always floored by how deeply personal and revealing it actually is.
As soon as you go into merchandising, everyone nods sagely and says, 'Ah, now we know why you are doing it.'
I have the reputation for having read all of Henry James. Which would argue a misspent youth and middle age.
Wearing a bath towel around the school yard and pretending it's a cape doesn't mean you have magical powers.
Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals... except the weasel.
My standard comment is, 'If you don't want your kids to be like Bart Simpson, don't act like Homer Simpson.'
You see that's what I think is such a terrible, terrible betrayal, the trust that people have in government.
The dreamer creates his dreams for his own purposes, selecting only those symbols which have meaning to him.
I like characters who have blind spots and are full of themselves, but there also needs to be vulnerability.
I don't really picture anyone when I'm drawing. They just become their own completed person with googly eyes.