Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.
Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.
I am not afraid of death. I just don't want to be there when it happens.
I am two with nature.
Me and nature are two.
I am plagued by doubts.
I read in self-defense.
Life is for the living.
Take the money and run.
Life's hard, then you die.
Those who can't do, teach!
Subjectivity is objective.
I'm awash in self-contempt!
Death is an acquired trait.
Marriage is the death of hope.
The heart wants what it wants.
I hope you're getting this down.
Showing up is 80 percent of life.
I foresee death by culture shock.
Paranoia is knowing all the facts.
God is either cruel or incompetent.
I can levitate birds. No one cares.
In the event of war, I'm a hostage.
90% of success in life is showing up
We Are The Sum Total Of Our Choices.
The best things in life are censored.
90 per cent of success is turning up.
Why ruin a good story with the truth?
I don't know enough to be incompetent.
You mellow too much you ripen and rot.
I am an only child. I have one sister.
Is sex dirty? Only if it's done right.
I want to return to the womb, anyone's.
Chastity is curable, if detected early.
All i have in my life is my imagination
Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.
Your self-esteem is a notch below Kafka.
My brain? It's my second favorite organ!
Tradition is the illusion of permanance.
Eighty percent of success is showing up.
I'm a teleological, existential agnostic.
I'm not anti-social. I'm just not social.
Error, no keyboard. Press F1 to continue.
If you aren't failing, you aren't trying.
Your audience teaches you how to be funny.
You can't ride two horses with one behind.
I see the glass half full...but of poison.
Ninety percent of life is just showing up.
If God exists, I hope he has a good excuse.
I tended to place my wife under a pedestal.
