Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
Chris Rock is a very funny man.
Nashville, man. That's the place to be.
I was a big Dave Winfield guy growing up.
Guy Fieri's hair is the front lawn to hell.
I keep my politics a little closer to me than others do.
I've had two pedicures in my life, and they were glorious.
Do whatever you want to do in the privacy of your own home.
When youre young, the blue blazer feels like a grown-up costume.
When you're young, the blue blazer feels like a grown-up costume.
Bachelor parties would pay a lot of money to hire Pat Buchanan to come.
In our deepest places, we all wish we could live like Raoul Duke for a while.
The nice thing about 'Morning Joe' is that I do get to do serious news sometimes.
The thing about me is that I don't judge my audience. I welcome. It is a big tent.
If the relentless personal maintenance plan has taken over your life, give it a rest.
It doesn't matter if you're famous or infamous. All that matters is you're a celebrity.
I don't think anybody's quite accurately branded me. I'm not sure I could do it myself.
What can you say about Guy's cooking that hasn't been printed on a packet of cigarettes?
I'm pretty sure people are going to start writing letters again once the email fad passes.
When you live in New York City, you run up a long list of things you've been meaning to do.
Bacon. Crispy. Salty. I could just eat a mountain of bacon for breakfast; it's so delicious.
I never drink coffee, can you believe that? Works in morning television, doesn't drink coffee.
Golf is the only sport where watching the game is arguably as grueling physically as playing it.
My dad was always fascinated and amused by Trump, so I learned to be fascinated and amused by Trump.
When you work in TV long enough, you tend to get a little jaded with different things you have to deal with.
You don't really have to say much when your headline is 'Drag Queen Robs Burger King.' Sometimes comedy writes itself.
I'm not a huge luck guy. I think you make your own luck. I don't really believe in some other force making your own luck.
I'm not a coffee drinker, so my drink is kind of like a girlie skim chai latte. I'm not proud of it, but it's really good.
Sometimes @BrookeShields rolls into your party dressed as a Christmas tree, carrying a bucket of KFC. pic.twitter.com/DTtZkZY4cB
Landing on 'Morning Joe' wasn't a fluke. I was a poli sci major in college. I interned at the CBS political unit, covered conventions.
My routine is to ride that snooze button as far as it will take me, take a quick shower, get dressed in the dark and bolt out the door.
High on the list of things I've been meaning to do since I moved to New York in 2004 is going up to a Columbia University football game.
My daughter will be reading about Pat Buchanan in a history book someday, and I am hanging out fist-bumping with him and joking with him.
I'm 6-foot-4. If my life depended on it, I could still dunk a basketball. Then I would need assistance from a first responder to get down from the rim.
Watching 'CSI: Miami' is like watching 'Teen Jeopardy!' or doing the crossword puzzle in 'People' magazine. It makes you feel smart even when you're not.
I do remember vividly sometime after puberty when I'd answer the phone at home and the callers began to say, 'Hi, Bill!' That's when I knew Dad and I had the same voice.
In a tradition second in wonderful absurdity only to 60-year-old baseball managers wearing uniforms and spikes in the dugout, golf spectators come dressed ready to play 18.
I am one of the five best parallel parkers in the United States of America. Dead serious. It's to the point now where I look back when pulling into the spot only as a formality.
It's fun to deliver material on live TV because it's more off-the-cuff, but I like writing better. You really can measure the joke, think an extra second and nail the right reference.
My dad is so unique in what he does. It's not like I'm taking a torch from him and doing his thing. I hope I've carried from him a little bit of a sense of irony, a little bit of a wink.
I hope I pass on my dad's good humor, work ethic and lack of self-seriousness. Our house was always a fun place where you'd get knocked around quickly if you took yourself too seriously.
I think President Obama has always been a little bit underestimated. Some of the things he's done with foreign policy have been unassailable. Getting us out of Iraq, killing Osama Bin Laden.
I think there's something about the homemade birthday cake, because my wife, on my daughter's first birthday, started the tradition where she takes a full cake and cuts the number birthday out of it.
Everyone worries about their kids, of course, but you can drive yourself nuts thinking about all the horrible things in the world - and many, many people do. I believe life is to be lived and not survived.
The great 'New York Times' columnist Dave Anderson famously slept one year in a child's race-car bed. There he was, Pulitzer Prize and all, snoring as his feet dangled over the rear tires of Lightning McQueen.
I have a simple plan to solve the economic crisis. Give every American a $100 credit to the dog track of their choice. I have found the puppies to be a reliable source of income with a consistent rate of return.
I often eat Skippys Super Chunk peanut butter out of the jar with a spoon. I dont shamefully sneak it in the dark of night when everyone is in bed. I just twist that cap off and go to town right out in the open.
I often eat Skippy's Super Chunk peanut butter out of the jar with a spoon. I don't shamefully sneak it in the dark of night when everyone is in bed. I just twist that cap off and go to town right out in the open.
I hate to make this point too often, but imagine for a moment George W. Bush were on his sixth vacation, and he was asked about Iraq, and he said 'I'm buying shrimp.' You think that wouldn't be a headline everywhere?
People know the facts of a story just as well as the people on TV do, and they have more platforms to hold the media accountable when they don't get it right. We are a world full of media experts. That's a great thing.
New York, it's people. It's grit. It's diversity of people. It's diversity of industry. In L.A. everyone's looking over their shoulder because one of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills just walked in. They value the wrong things.