Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
I will not be misquoted!
Anyone who bombs is my friend.
I have a podiatrist appointment at 2.
I like Cilantro, but you don't have to.
People in New York love having roof parties.
I loved Australia. I was very successful there
There seems to be more comedy for comedy's sake
There seems to be more comedy for comedy's sake.
My sister sometimes does a Todd Barry tribute act.
Buddha, much like everyone else has good and bad days.
I don't feel I'm even worthy of a normal amount of value.
I wasn't as nervous as I thought I would be when I started
I wasn't as nervous as I thought I would be when I started.
You always think you're better than you are in the beginning.
I used to write things out beforehand. But sometimes it backfires
I used to write things out beforehand. But sometimes it backfires.
I like pens. My writing is so amazing there's never a need to erase
I guess there seems to be clubs opening up again, which is strange.
I like pens. My writing is so amazing there's never a need to erase.
I'd rather send out a mass email then hang posters all over the place
I'd rather send out a mass email then hang posters all over the place.
I'm traveling the world, ripping rooms apart with my stupendous comedy.
I'm particularly proud of my reluctance to share my dreams with anyone.
It was actually 3 years between albums. That seems like a long time to me
And the goal really is to make the audience laugh, to bring them some joy.
If I'm at a party and someone puts on a Blues Brothers tape, I tend to go nuts.
I don't ban bloggers from my shows. I have a separate line: VIP seating for bloggers.
I don't really know much about pirates, or pirate culture. I'd be a contrarian pirate.
I don't know any astronauts. There are a lot of people who say they want to be comedians.
I love chicken. I would eat chicken fingers on Thanksgiving if it were socially acceptable.
I did end up doing substitute teaching, but there's not a lot of teaching involved in that.
It's cool to go to a place that has posters up and it's one night only. It feels more special.
I've never been a TV junkie. I remember watching Letterman way back when he had a morning show.
I do not like sports, unless you consider treating all humankind with love and respect a sport.
I want to release another CD this year, finish writing a screenplay, and make another short film
I want to release another CD this year, finish writing a screenplay, and make another short film.
I am the the type to have a personal experience with a celebrity, but I'm too classy to bring that up.
I got access to a private tour of the zoo. I got to go in a cage with a koala, which I highly recommend.
If you see me at a restaurant, blow me a kiss, wave, blow me another kiss, then walk five steps backward.
I had temping jobs also. I liked the flexibility. There was no asking for time off; you just didn't work.
I must have done everything I had. You go through years where you go through everything you've ever written
I mean, I've always had scattered interests, but I never went on stage to get an agent or anything like that
You come there and hang out and have a drink before the show and eat, so it's not that brutal. It's only $6.
I mean, I've always had scattered interests, but I never went on stage to get an agent or anything like that.
I liked the koala, wallaby, and I chilled with a kangaroo a bit. There was a wombat that I quite enjoyed also
I liked the koala, wallaby, and I chilled with a kangaroo a bit. There was a wombat that I quite enjoyed also.
I once sat next to Jim from Wild Kingdom on a flight from Atlanta. I find mentioning that opens a lot of doors.
I haven't done a lot in London. I think comedy over there is how it was over here years ago. There's tons of it, and they're better paid.
I basically did comedy there for about a year, and then moved to New York. If I had it to do over again, I would have booked myself on the road for at least a year.
Well, I have since seen you at Tinkle. It's a comedy show started by David Cross, me and Jon Benjamin. It features a wide variety of acts for all tastes and seasons.