Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
I really enjoy the social aspects of music as much as anything.
To have someone play off and be with a band is more pleasurable.
You kill me and I'll see that you never work in this town again.
Unlike Ray Porter, his love is fearless and without reservation.
It was essential that I never show doubt about what I was doing.
Knowledge of means without knowledge of ends is animal training.
If I screw up raising my kids, nothing I achieve will matter much.
I was seeking comic originality, and fame fell on me as a byproduct.
introductions are hard to come by when your natural state is shyness
Were they beautiful? We were all beautiful. We were in our twenties.
It's a mystery to me the way that contemporary art galleries function.
All I've ever wanted was an honest week's pay for an honest day's work.
I just gave my cat a bath. Now how do I get all this fur off my tounge?
I've heard lots of people lie to themselves but they never fool anyone.
You want to be a bit compulsive in your art or craft or whatever you do.
To be with another woman, that is French. To be caught, that is American.
You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.
I started a grease fire at McDonald's - threw a match in the cook's hair.
The conscious mind is the editor, and the subconscious mind is the writer.
I've got to keep breathing. It'll be my worst business mistake if I don't.
I love doing my surreal sing-along that had words that no one could follow.
. . . Now you see . . . they' re not fit for humans . . ." "Put them on me.
Some people have a way with words, and other people...oh, uh, not have way.
Somewhere in the world is...The world's worst doctor and he could be yours.
It's not the size of the nose that matters, it's what's inside that counts.
I've decided to take up smoking, my doctor said I wasn't getting enough tar.
Chaos in the midst of chaos isn't funny, but chaos in the midst of order is.
When I finally retire, I just want to go away so no one has to listen to me.
Rebelliousness really is the province of young people-that kind of iconoclasm.
I can't smell moth balls, I find it too difficult to get their tiny legs apart
I just downloaded eleven hundred books onto my Kindle, and now I can’t lift it.
I was deeply unhappy, but I didn't know it because I was so happy all the time.
I will do anything to look like him - except, of course, exercise or eat right.
When someone less capable is ahead of me, I am not pleased. It makes me insane.
She had destroyed whatever was between us by making a profound gaffe: She met me.
I cannot smell mothballs because it's so difficult to get their little legs apart.
What is comedy? Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke.
The presence of excessive wealth puts an unnatural spin on the appreciation of art.
With comedy, you have no place to go but more comedy, so you're never off the hook.
she is nearing forty and not so easily forgiven as when her skin bloomed like roses.
Working at the magic shop really gave me a sense of comedy because it was all jokes.
The banjo is truly an American instrument, and it captures something about our past.
Mirabelle is attractive; it's just that she is never the first or second girl chosen.
They want me on the television shows now because I did so well on Celebrity Assholes.
I could never be a woman, 'cause I'd just stay home and play with my breasts all day.
I'm not a human being. I'm despicable and disgusting - but that's where the money is.
First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.
I'm not trying to be a big shot or anything like that, but I get my drinks half price.
I thought yesterday was the first day of the rest of my life but it turns out today is.
I guess I wouldn't believe in anything if it weren't for my lucky astrology mood watch.