There is nothing in the world like persuasive speech to fuddle the mental apparatus.

High and fine literature is wine, and mine is only water; but everybody likes water.

I've lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.

The principle of give and take is the principle of diplomacy - give one and take ten

What a man wants with religion in these breadless times, surpasses my comprehension.

The less there is to justify a traditional custom, the harder it is to get rid of it

Truth is stranger than fiction-to some people, but I am measurably familiar with it.

Why shouldn't truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense.

The only people that a bank will loan money to is the very people who don't need it.

To do good is noble. To tell others to do good is even nobler and much less trouble.

Lord save us all from a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms.

He could charm an audience an hour on a stretch without ever getting rid of an idea.

It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.

Thousands of geniuses live and die undiscovered - either by themselves or by others.

I have been on the verge of being an angel all my life, but it's never happened yet.

You want to be very careful about lying; otherwise you are nearly sure to get caught.

For we were little Christian children and early learned the value of forbidden fruit.

What are the proper proportions of a maxim? A minimum of sound to a maximum of sense.

What do you think of the human mind? I mean, in case you think there is a human mind.

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.

The only difference between reality and fiction is that fiction needs to be credible.

Never run after you own hat - others will be delighted to do it; why spoil their fun?

He had only one vanity; he thought he could give advice better than any other person.

It is at our mother's knee that we acquire our noblest and truest and highest ideals.

The ability to find solutions to life's challenges is what makes us grow as a person.

It is better to take what does not belong to you than to let it lie around neglected.

What a curious kind of fool a girl is. Never been licked in school. What's a licking?

Humorists of the 'mere' sort cannot survive. Humor is only a fragrance, a decoration.

A healthy and wholesome cheerfulness is not necessarily impossible to any occupation.

Each person is born to one possession which outvalues all his others-his last breath.

Temperate temperance is best; intemperate temperance injures the cause of temperance.

When in doubt tell the truth. It will confound your enemies and astound your friends.

The ignorant are afraid to betray surprise or admiration...they think it ill manners.

Focus more on your desire than on your doubt, and the dream will take care of itself.

The house was as empty as a beer closet in premises where painters have been at work.

Heaven is the very last place to come to rest and don't you be afraid to bet on that!

Every time I read a Jane Austen novel, I feel like a bartender at the gates of heaven.

Good judgement is the result of experience and experience the result of bad judgement.

And how moving is the eloquence of the untaught when it is the heart that is speaking!

Whatever thing men call great, look for it in Joan of Arc, and there you will find it.

Apparently one of the most uncertain things in the world is the funeral of a religion.

There are some few people I respect and admire, but I don't think much of the species.

An author values a compliment even when it comes from a source of doubtful competency.

A man who keeps company with glaciers comes to feel tolerably insignificant by and by.

If there was two birds sitting on a fence, he would bet you which one would fly first.

I like Joan of Arc best of all my books; and it is the best; I know it perfectly well.

You thunder and lightning too much; the reader ceases to get under the bed, by and by.

The smallest minds and the selfishest souls and the cowardliest hearts that God makes.

I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.

Not all the Greek runners in the original Olympics were totally naked. Some wore shoes.

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