Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
I cannot abide anyone treating another human being like a piece of dirt, whatever the context.
I think there's a far more general audience now because I've done more populist stuff on telly.
Television provokes strong opinions, and sometimes we try a bit too hard to appeal to everyone.
When I was at school you got an overall general education on many things, even just basic facts.
My dad's a very sensitive man, but as the archetypal rebellious teenager, I didn't realise that.
Once you get labelled, people expect you to behave within the very narrow confines of that label.
When I was at school you got an overall general education, on many things, even just basic facts.
The funny thing is, I don't actually think of myself as fat at all. I don't think I am. Not really.
I'm sure some cynical people would point to that as the main reason for doing it for a lot of people.
There's lots of different feminist groups. It's not as straightforward as just looking like a plumber.
I like to read my diary occasionally to remind myself what a miserable, alienated old sod I used to be.
I went on the pill when I was 16, put on four stone... so that proved to be a very effective contraceptive.
I think it's difficult, if you're a quite private person like I am, to write about your life very intimately.
Being Christian towards poor people means trying to improve their lives and give them back some self-respect.
When I was a nurse my favourite assignment was the anorexic ward. I sometimes ate as many as seventeen dinners
My mum taught me to knit when I was a child, and I turn to it, for some weird reason, when I'm feeling depressed.
I'm not a flag waver for obesity. It's not healthy, and you have a crap life because there is such a downer on it.
There are lots of people who believe that caricature of me the tabloids created, so they think they don't like me.
I have a utilitarian approach to dressing; as long as I quite like it and it covers me up, I don't care what it is.
I have friends who vote Tory, and I'm appalled, but that's not to say they're not great people in so many other ways.
No one I know is actually so rude as to tell me I've become duller since having children. But I'm sure they think it.
There are 10-20 times more male comics than female comics; it's something to do with the social structure of society.
I like men. They are hugely entertaining, but they have a lot of shortcomings and you just have to bear those in mind.
I used to get nervous about three weeks before a gig... now I've managed to condense it down to a manageable ten minutes.
Everything becomes magnified at night. Sounds travel in a different way, it's dark, and everything seems far more spooky.
People are so different in reality from the picture created of them on TV. So it's all a creation; everything is made up.
I like the purity of stand-up because it is all about whether people laugh at your jokes. Either they laugh or they don't.
I'm too nervous to eat before I go onstage, and I'll usually eat out after the performance or when I get home at midnight.
Most of us manage the fateful things that happen in our lives the best we can, certainly not to a Stalin-like 20-year plan.
Jeremy Clarkson is rather charming, but I can't stomach his public persona. I don't like his casual racism and casual misogyny.
Work motivates me. I love what I do and I'm a positive person, I've always liked what I've done as a job - however grim it was.
I took my husband to the hospital yesterday to have 17 stitches out - that'll teach him to buy me a sewing kit for my birthday.
And I also felt that no one in an audience could abuse me worse than the sort of abuse I had had at work as a psychiatric nurse.
I've never trained as an actor. I've always thought I'm not a good actor. I've been told I'm not a good actor by a lot of people.
They say revenge is a dish best eaten cold, but for most people, by the time it's ready to eat, they just don't fancy it any more.
My preference is swimming in the sea. I find the sea is more liberating, wild and good fun rather than plodding up and down a pool.
You know it's time for a New Year's resolution to lose weight when you step on a talking scale and it says, "One at a time, please.
Occasionally, some sitcoms still stereotype women - the old dragon or the dolly bird - but on the whole we've moved away from that.
Even when I wasn't overweight I was never one of those girls or women who wanted to look nice. I always thought it wasn't important.
Does anyone really go into nursing intending to be apathetic, cold and removed from suffering? I find that very difficult to believe.
I buy smoked mackerel in a vain attempt at being healthy. I do actually really like it, and you don't have to cook it, which is handy.
I remember when Victoria Wood started to come through, and I thought she was great, though she and I are very different in our approach.
I was always being called upon to be an honorary boy alongside my brothers. I don't think I'd be a comic now if it hadn't been for that.
I've always liked to think I could do anything I wished as well as - if not better than - a man. But I wasn't very good at rally driving.
I did try when I wasn't doing the singing to do as much comedy as I could because I thought with Comic Relief you are duty bound to anyway.
I used to get a lot of people saying 'Oh, you are such a lucky granny.' But the fact of the matter is you can be a grandma at 35 these days.
I think the key attributes for a good speaker are someone that's articulate and someone that puts a fair amount of humour into what they do.
I never think, 'Where am I going to be in a year's time?' That seems to be a sure way of missing the fact that you might be quite happy now.
I have such admiration for single mothers. I simply don't comprehend how you'd cope with that intensity, the lack of breaks, ever, on your own.
With two small children, I haven't had a wash since 2001 so the chance to go shopping is way down the list. It is something I do intend to get.