Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
The 'Stephanie Plums' are very much Jersey books. So you can't get away from attitude and objectionable language.
I don't mean to change the subject or anything, but have you tried concealer on that zit?" Cynthia Lotte - Hot Six
What are you doing back at the bakery?” I asked [Diesel]. “Did you know Wulf was here?” “No. I knew food was here.
You can run, but you can't hide, Cupcake." Morelli said. "I'll find you." "You are such a cop." "Tell me about it.
I was watching television and I saw how you stick your fingers in a person's eyes to slow them down." Grandma Mazur
Suppose something goes wrong? Suppose you need a big full-figure woman like me to help straighten things out?" Lula
Make sure your main characters are likeable. They can be flawed, but your readers need to be able to root for them.
You're probably gonna find this hard to believe, but I was sort of weird when I was a kid." Salvatore "Sally" Sweet
Omigod,' I said on a sudden flash of sleep-deprived insight. 'You're the big bad wolf.' There are some similarities.
I met a real looker. He picked me up at the two dollar slot machines, so you know he's no cheapskate." Grandma Mazur
Your on your on with this one babe." "Coward." "Calling me names isn't going to get me in there." -Ranger and Stephanie
Omygod, I haven’t got years. I’ll have to hide in the Bat Cave.” “Once you go to the Bat Cave it’s forever, babe.” Eeek.
I wasnt always a writer. When I went to college and majored in fine arts, I was a painter. Then I was a stay-at-home mom.
I attributed the incidence to temporary insanity, and in my own defense, I'd like to say I haven't run over anyone since.
I wasn't always a writer. When I went to college and majored in fine arts, I was a painter. Then I was a stay-at-home mom.
And then it gets so hot that they keep the supermarkets too cold. Hot, cold. Hot, cold. It gives me the runs." Mr. Landowsky
On the bright side, I'm sure this isn't the last time you'll ever get firebombed, so maybe you'll have better luck next time.
I wasn't sure exactly how prostitutes determined price, but if men bought hookers by the pound, these two would be doing okay.
Get me a gun. If I don't go into labor soon, I'm going to shoot myself. And pass the gravy. Pass it now." Valerie - To the Nines
THERE ARE SOME MEN who enter a woman’s life and screw it up forever. Joseph Morelli did this to me—not forever, but periodically.
I disconnected and made a mental note not to call Tank unless I was bleeding profusely, and he was the only other person on earth.
Does your mother know that you're carrying a gun? I'm going to tell her. I'm going to call and tell her right now." Joe Morelli's mom
Some people learn from books, some listen to the advice of others, some learn from mistakes. I fit into the last category. So sue me.
If I let her in I'm doomed. It's like inviting a vampire into your house. Once you've invite them in, that's it, you're good as dead!
Kate O'Hare is a former SEAL and is currently in the FBI - we know that there are no women in the SEALs, but we think there should be.
they have enough testosterone between them, if testosterone were electricity they could light up New York City for the month of August
I take in a lot of stuff from real life, movies, television, news and it all gets mixed in my head and somehow turns into a story idea.
Just because i know how to change a guys oil doesn't mean i want to spend the rest of my life on my back, staring up his undercarriage.
You must be a terrible burden to your mother. I am feeling so sorry for her not to have a proper daughter." Mrs. Apusenja - To the Nines
How was your day?" Morelli asked me. "Oh, you know, the usual. Stole a truck. Blew up a building, and brought seven monkeys home with me.
Last time you called me late at night you were naked and chained to your shower curtain rod. I hope this isn't going to be disappointing.
If I didn't know better, I'd think you were trying to get me drunk," I said to Ranger. "Not drunk," Ranger said. "Just relaxed and naked.
I knew there were no such things as death cooties. Unfortunately, that's an intellectual fact. And death cooties are an emotional reality.
Transitions are critically important. I want the reader to turn the page without thinking she's turning the page. It must flow seamlessly.
Lots of times I'm not crazy about the writing, but I keep moving ahead and somehow it gets better. The important thing is to move forward.
My mother drove back to the intersection. "Who are you dating?" "Don't ask," I said. I wasn't dating anyone. I was fornicating with Batman.
Is that a bulletproof vest? See, now that's so insulting. That's like saying I'm not smart enough to shoot you in the head." Eddie DeChooch
I want to see your tailpipe fading off into the sunset." Good luck, I thought. My tailpipe was somewhere on Route 1, along with my muffler.
And the closest I've come to an out-of-body experience was when Joe Morelli took his mouth to me fourteen years ago, behind the eclair case.
Cracker Jacks don't count as junk food because they're corn and peanuts, which we know to be high in nutrition. And they have a prize inside.
There is no such thing as a good call at 7 AM. It's been my experience that all calls between the hours of 11 PM and 9 AM are disaster calls.
Pete- What does a woman want out of marriage? Louisa- Undying devotion and a warm place to put her cold feet when she gets into bed at night.
Well, sure, but I don't bring God into it. I think shower massage might have been invented by the devil. God invented the missionary position.
Inspiration is easy. The hard part is getting the inspiration onto 300 pages in an interesting, cohesive, easy-to-read but hard-to-forget story.
I guessed my mother figured if my father got right down to the task of eating he wouldn’t be so inclined to jump up and strangle my grandmother.
My world is better. Why would I want to waste my time playing golf? I can get up in the morning and be in this whole other world. I love my life.
It was a weird sensation. Like getting caught eavesdropping, or lying, or sitting on the toilet and having the bathroom walls suddenly drop away.
You can get through very serious and sometimes horrible and sometimes embarrassing and very awkward situations with humor. It gives us a way out.
When I was painting, I was painting stories I was telling myself. When I look back at it, moving to writing was a very natural progression for me.
I took all of my rejection letters - there must have been thousands of them in a huge box - and I went out on the curb and burned them all, crying.