Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
Tape "Seinfeld" for me.
Funny is when you're serious.
I got canceled in the middle of making the pilot.
I went to the Goodman School of Drama in Chicago.
People who become comedians… come from pain, come from conflict.
I played Hamlet, I played Chekhov and Ibsen and all the classics.
Using Viagra is like putting a new flagpole on a condemned building.
Then I got out of the service, and I was going to be a Shakespearean actor.
Although in Abbott and Costello, and straight man was first. That's a very interesting concept.
You have to have a certain persona to be a star, you know, and I don't have that. I'm a banana.
But there's a lot of 50's and a lot of boomers and a lot of kids in their 30's that grew up with us.
I mean, we had on our show, we had marriages, divorces and other stuff going on. And that was just me.
And it's tough traveling. You know, the hotels and the airports and all that. That part, eating and getting around to the hotel room and then going on.
And I went to New York and died; for 10 years I walked those pavements. I can't think of New York without feeling uncomfortable and feeling like a failure.
I wish there was something that - I get all those wonderful letters and wonderful acknowledgments, and I wish I could be more appreciative of what I do. But it's hard for me.
They say it's good but I didn't know what I was doing until I got into the suit and they put the moustache on me, and somehow, when I got all the drag on, it came out. It was the most amazing thing. I'm truly extraordinary.
Men, you are about to embark on a great crusade to stamp out runaway decency in the west. Now you men will only be risking your lives, whilst I will be risking an almost certain Academy Award nomination for Best Supporting Actor.
You asked what is the secret of a really good sketch. And it is a sketch is a small play. It's got a beginning, and a middle and an end. It should have a plot; it should have the characters, conflict. It is a little play. And in it, will be funny stuff.