Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
If at age 20 you are not a Communist then you have no heart. If at age 30 you are not a Capitalist then you have no brains.
You cannot have power for good without having power for evil too. Even mother's milk nourishes murderers as well as heroes.
The best bought-up children are those who have seen thier parents as they are. Hypocrisy is not the first duty of a parent.
A fool's brain digests philosophy into folly, science into superstition, and art into pedantry. Hence University education.
Not everybody is strong enough to endure life without an anesthetic. Drink probably averts more gross crime than it causes.
I have found, after a good deal of consideration, that the best place to seek God is in a garden. You can dig for Him here.
No sooner had Jesus knocked over the dragon of superstition than Paul boldly set it on its legs again in the name of Jesus.
We are not taught to think decently on sex subjects, and consequently we have no language for them except indecent language.
When the master has come to do everything through the slave, the slave becomes his master, since he cannot live without him.
Jesus remains unshaken as the practical man; and we stand exposed as the fools, the blunderers, the unpractical visionaries.
In literature the ambition of the novice is to acquire the literary language; the struggle of the adept is to get rid of it.
Nowadays a parlor maid as ignorant as Queen Victoria was when she came to the throne would be classed as mentally defective.
You sometimes have to answer a woman according to her womanliness, just as you have to answer a fool according to his folly.
If 'Pygmalion' is not good enough for your friends with its own verbal music, their talent must be altogether extraordinary.
Nothing is more dreadful than a husband who keeps telling you everything he thinks, and always wants to know what you think.
I can forgive Alfred Nobel for having invented dynamite, but only a fiend in human form could have invented the Nobel Prize.
The only way for a woman to provide for herself decently is for her to be good to some man that can afford to be good to her.
The philosopher is Nature's pilot. And there you have our difference: to be in hell is to drift: to be in heaven is to steer.
The secret of being miserable is to have leisure to bother about whether you are happy or not. The cure for it is occupation.
A little learning is a dangerous thing, but we must take that risk because a little is as much as our biggest heads can hold.
Two people getting together to write a book is like three people getting together to have a baby. One of them is superfluous.
This is my father. Try what you can with him! He won't listen to me, because he remembers what a fool I was when I was a baby.
As long as more people will pay admission to a theater to see a naked body than to see a naked brain, the drama will languish.
The confusing of marriage with morality has done more to destroy the conscience of the human race than any other single error.
Reviewing has one advantage over suicide: in suicide you take it out on yourself; in reviewing you take it out on other people.
Assassination is the extreme form of censorship; and it seems hard to justify an incitement to it on anti-censorial principles.
Marriage is tolerable enough in its way if youre easygoing and dont expect too much from it. But it doesnt bear thinking about.
The worst sin toward our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them: that's the essence of inhumanity.
HIGGINS. Have you no morals, man? DOOLITTLE [unabashed] Cant afford them, Governor. Neither could you if you was as poor as me.
When a heretic wishes to avoid martyrdom he speaks of "Orthodoxy, True and False" and demonstrates that the True is his heresy.
If in the library of your house you do not have the works of the ancient Greek writers, then you live in a house with no light.
Every drunken skipper trusts to Providence. But one of the ways of Providence with drunken skippers is to run them on the rocks.
I am the most spontaneous speaker in the world because every word, every gesture, and every retort has been carefully rehearsed.
Of all human struggles there is none so treacherous and remorseless as the struggle between the artist man and the mother woman.
A serious illness or a death advertises the doctor exactly as a hanging advertises the barrister who defended the person hanged.
The moment we want to believe something, we suddenly see all the arguments for it, and become blind to the arguments against it.
The British are apt to make merits of their stupidities, and to represent their various incapacities as points of good breeding.
Idiots are always in favour of inequality of income (their only chance of eminence), and the really great in favour of equality.
In a battle all you need to make you fight is a little hot blood and the knowledge that it's more dangerous to lose than to win.
Optimistic lies have such immense therapeutic value that a doctor who cannot tell them convincingly has mistaken his profession.
Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee.
For four wicked centuries the world has dreamed this foolish dream of efficiency; and the end is not yet. But the end will come.
If a man is indolent, let him be poor. If he is drunken, let him be poor.... Also--somewhat inconsistently--blessed are the poor!
There is only one belief that can rob death of its sting and the grave of its victory. For without that you cannot be born again.
I hope you have lost your good looks, for while they last any fool can adore you, and the adoration of fools is bad for the soul.
It is easy - terribly easy - to shake a man's faith in himself. To take advantage of that to break a man's spirit is devil's work.
You accepted Allah or you had your throat cut by someone who did accept him, and who went to Paradise for having sent you to Hell.
If you leave your art, the world will beat you back to it. The world has not an ambition worth sharing, or a prize worth handling.
I make a fortune from criticizing the policy of the government, and then hand it over to the government in taxes to keep it going.
Never believe anything a writer tells you about himself. A man comes to believe in the end the lies he tells himself about himself.