Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
Smee! Raise the Ladies!
Never lick a steak knife.
Your friends love you anyway.
Too many rocks in the mountains.
Someone was tapping on the window.
Reading... a vacation for the mind.
maybe somebody finally shot the dog.
[There is] a breed of fashion models
I can snap your spine like a toothpick.
Please try not to be such a wiener-head.
There are no bad haircuts in cyberspace.
A secret society within a secret society.
I read a lot of lot non-demanding fiction.
Do not spit gum in the drinking fountains.
When I read that I had to go to Gettysburg.
Megahertz: This is really, really big hertz.
Cats are independent, by which I mean smart.
Eventually everyone has to die, except Elvis.
Found a smoldering cigarette left by a horse.
Be advised that there is no parking in Europe.
Take out the fortune before you eat the cookie.
Dogs make good pets because they are very loyal
Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
Dogs do not grasp the concept of house cleaning.
Life is anything that dies when you stomp on it.
Remember: What dad really wants is a nap. Really.
You should not confuse your career with your life.
The most powerful force in the universe is gossip.
Never trust anything you read in a travel article.
We don't shoot somebody soon, I'm gonna forget how
Nobody understands how hard it is, being a captain.
It may be meaningless, but at least it's a gesture.
Panicky despair is an underrated element of writing.
Your job is to give people a reason to keep reading.
The nuclear generator of brain sludge is television.
Line printer paper is strongest at the perforations.
Love and pregnancy and riding on a camel cannot be hid
'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'.
For people who like peace and quiet: a phoneless cord.
Don't emphasise money if you don't have much; be happy
Why else do we have Miami, if not to give me material?
I argue very well. Just ask any of my remaining friends.
Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.
Land!” shouted Thomas. “Is there food?” asked Tubby Ted.
The places where trails do not exist are not well marked.
WARNING: This is assuming your spouse's name is Margaret.
Miami drivers will attempt to pass you inside a car wash.
I do some of my best reading while seated in the bathroom.
You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.
