Darynda Jones Quotes - Page 1

• Darynda Jones / Author

You’re the reason I breathe

• Darynda Jones / Author

Do not disturb. Already there.

• Darynda Jones / Author

I had a soft spot for crazy people.

• Darynda Jones / Author

It is sexy in here or is it just me?

• Darynda Jones / Author

What in the name of Zeus's testicles?

• Darynda Jones / Author

This place is like crazy on crackers.

• Darynda Jones / Author

SARC- was my second favorite -ASM word

• Darynda Jones / Author

Mistakes were made. Others were blamed.

• Darynda Jones / Author

She's like a hurricane on crystal meth.

• Darynda Jones / Author

Whatever makes your balloon red, Swopes.

• Darynda Jones / Author

Jesus may love you, but i'm his favourite

• Darynda Jones / Author

There is a great need for a sarcasm font.

• Darynda Jones / Author

This is one Fruit Loop beyond certifiable.

• Darynda Jones / Author

I chose the road less traveled. Now I'm lost.

• Darynda Jones / Author

See you in a few. Hold down the fort, Mr. Wong!

• Darynda Jones / Author

When fighting clowns, always go for the juggler.

• Darynda Jones / Author

I'm a virgin. But this is an old shirt. --T-SHIRT

• Darynda Jones / Author

Least he's committed," I offered. "Or needs to be.

• Darynda Jones / Author

You know you have ADD when Look A chicken - T-shirt

• Darynda Jones / Author

That’s the thing about things. They tend to happen.

• Darynda Jones / Author

I knew dating the son of Satan would turn out badly

• Darynda Jones / Author

Ask me about my complete lack of interest. (T-shirt)

• Darynda Jones / Author

The police never find it as funny as you do.-T-Shirt

• Darynda Jones / Author

I intend to live forever. So far, so good. - T-SHIRT

• Darynda Jones / Author

I often question my sanity. Occasionally, it replies.

• Darynda Jones / Author

Friends don't let friends get killed by serial killers

• Darynda Jones / Author

Your existence gives me a headache. Go stand over there.

• Darynda Jones / Author

I could be irksome when I put my left ventricle into it.

• Darynda Jones / Author

It isn’t the fall that will kill you, but the sudden stop.

• Darynda Jones / Author

I know karate, and like two other Japanese words - T-SHIRT

• Darynda Jones / Author

I totally should've gone to Hogwarts when I had the chance.

• Darynda Jones / Author

If you must eat a banana in public, never make eye contact.

• Darynda Jones / Author

Drink coffee! Do stupid things faster and with more energy!

• Darynda Jones / Author

Pretending to drink coffee was similar to faking an orgasm.

• Darynda Jones / Author

In Cookie's defense, it was raining wildcats and rabid dogs.

• Darynda Jones / Author

When I want your opinion, I'll remove the duct tape.--T-SHIRT

• Darynda Jones / Author

Glitch was about as wild and unpredictable as a carrot stick.

• Darynda Jones / Author

You do have a tendency to severe spinal cords." "Only for you.

• Darynda Jones / Author

It’s all fun and games until someone loses a testicle. —T-SHIRT

• Darynda Jones / Author

You can't fix stupid, but you can numb it was a 2 by 4.--T-SHIRT

• Darynda Jones / Author

Hello?" I said, because Charley's House of Pasties seemed wrong.

• Darynda Jones / Author

I like to see the glass as half full, hopefully of jack daniels.

• Darynda Jones / Author

Don't judge me because I'm quiet. No one plans a murder out loud.

• Darynda Jones / Author

My goal in life is to have a psychiatric disorder named after me.

• Darynda Jones / Author

Yeah, but what happens if life hands me pickles? - Bumper sticker

• Darynda Jones / Author

If it weren’t for physics and law enforcement, I’d be unstoppable.

• Darynda Jones / Author

Where am I going and why am I in this handbasket? ~Bumper sticker~

• Darynda Jones / Author

I meant to behave. There were just too many other options.--T-SHIRT

• Darynda Jones / Author

guys have feelings too. But like...who cares? -Inspirational poster

• Darynda Jones / Author

Genius has its limitations. Insanity...not so much" -Bumper Sticker