Quotes of All Topics . Occasions . Authors
Employ empathy.
Comedy has no rules, per se.
I'm a naturally curious person.
I don't consider myself an educator.
I've always been kind of an information sponge.
I see myself as an avatar of curiosity and doubt.
Your date of birth is a security point for identity theft.
A lot of the language about Millennials is extremely gendered.
We've had erratic, weird presidents before. America's still here.
Generational thinking has always been reductive and condescending.
Human capacity for not thinking about what we're doing is infinite.
Doing a format parody is one of my favorite things to do in comedy.
When something actually shocks me, that's when you know it's a great topic.
One of my favorite things about sketch comedy is doing parodies and music videos.
We don't claim to be infallible. I don't claim to be giving you truths from on high.
I consider myself to be doing comedy in a post-Jon Stewart world to a certain extent.
As a comedian, I am attracted to truths that are uncomfortable. I like funny bummers.
I think that people are more eager to learn about food than almost every other topic.
You can learn more about anything, and the truth about almost anything is surprising.
I don't claim to have all the answers; after all, I'm just a comedian who reads a lot.
Comics are regularly asked to perform for impossible rooms. They're called 'hell gigs.'
It's one thing to make people laugh, but after a certain point, comedy is almost cheap.
I think the best comedy enlightens, informs, and changes the way people look at the world.
In my moments of greatest hubris, I say to myself, 'Yes, you should be trying to change the world.'
That's something I learned as a philosophy major: The philosophy ethos is, always question, never rest.
I can't think of another place other than TV where a five-person sketch comedy group could make a living.
I find that a really restful, relaxing way to spend time on a plane is to listen to an audiobook while drawing.
The idea that you must bathe every day is, to a certain extent, a manufacture on the part of the soap industry.
I wanted to go to grad school for philosophy, but I couldn't hack it in college, at least I couldn't at that level.
My goal as a comedian is to sway people's opinion. It's not my only goal and it's not the only way I measure myself.
Fingerprint matching is - you know the whole thing about how no two fingerprints are alike? That's not strictly true.
I wanted to go to grad school in philosophy... Nobody was like, 'You should!' You know, they were all like, 'you could?'
There's no replacement for having a burning desire to talk about something: 'I know this and other people need to know!'
Late 19th-century America was basically a plutocratic enterprise while people toiled in mines and died of coal dust poisoning.
There is nothing better than getting to just dig in and seriously play a video game for a six-hour flight from New York to L.A.
Some people are writers and don't ever want to be on camera, some people act and not write - I like writing words for myself to say.
I loved 'Beakman's World' growing up. As much as I loved 'Bill Nye,' I always preferred 'Beakman's World' because I thought it was funnier.
Wading River was a gorgeous place to grow up and I feel very lucky there was a wood by our house where I could go explore when I was a kid.
In a live setting, the audience is trapped and can't leave. That really makes the audience be with you and laugh more because you're there.
I wrote for this sketch group called Olde English for about six years and we made a movie together, but we sort of stopped making sketches.
Young people are narcissistic. They become less narcissistic as they age, but they become crankier about younger people being narcissistic.
I don't want to change people's opinions to my political opinion; I want to enlighten people and make them think about the world differently.
I think that at the end of the day correcting misinformation and questioning what we think we know as a habit of mind is incredibly important.
I'm a liberal arts comedian and the definition of liberal arts is all spheres of human knowledge, coexisting, mixing and influencing each other.
I'm the only member of my family who didn't get a PhD. So, I'm like the failure of the family, cause all I have is a bachelor's, like a drop out.
It's the reaction I've gotten my whole life: that I learn something and try to tell people in conversation, but when I tell them, they are annoyed.
In philosophy you're never 100% sure. You're always undermining what you think you know. That's always been my philosophy and my intellectual ethos.
People are so quick to demonize and stereotype those on the other side that they often say that it's impossible to work with people on the other side.
My goal is to be able to speak to everyone in the country and to be able to make everyone in the country think differently about our political system.
I am not an educator and I'm not a journalist. I am a comedian. But I do truly believe that the point of comedy is to make the world around one better.